Want to Build Good Relationships? Stop Making This Error

Want to Build Good Relationships? Stop Making This Error

Female broadcaster holding microphone with white text reading “building relationships”

There is a great story about building good relationships. It starts with a young reporter given an assignment to interview two politicians competing for a seat in an upcoming election.

She books appointments to interview both. She sets off to conduct her first interview. Her boss asks her how the interview went when her gets back.

She replies, “It was fascinating. When I left, I thought he was the most interesting person in the world.”

The next day she interviews the other candidate. Her boss asks her how this one went.

“Even better!” she says, “When I left, I thought I was the most interesting person in the world.”

The lesson in that story is one we should all learn: the topic of greatest interest to each of us is ourselves. It’s the subject we’re most comfortable talking about.

Building Good Relationships

Something else to remember about this story: we’re probably the only person on the planet mesmerized by our own story.

It never fails to amaze me how many people I meet who talk endlessly of their own exploits, accomplishments and lives in general without ever pausing to take a breath and ask a question.

Building relationships is done through dialogue, not monologues.

If you are speaking for more than 50% of any conversation, you’re delivering a monologue. Eventually the other person tunes out.

When monologues are your de facto conversation style, almost everyone will eventually tune you out.

Almost nothing will stop your success faster than this habit.

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it will make you more interesting, engaging and someone whom other people seek out. It is key to building relationships. Sounds like a great habit to me.

Till we read again.

Photo of Rael Kalley,Habits coach in calgary canada

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