These are, to use an increasingly tired cliché, unprecedented times. How to stay optimistic has gone from a temporary challenge to genuine crisis for many people. However, for most of us, how to stay optimistic in the face of adversity is something well within our control.
If I had one piece of advice for people perpetually miserable with the current state of their life it would be to stop blaming others for it. We all landed on this planet endowed with the greatest gift possible – the gift of thought – and contained within that jewel lay a diamond encrusted and gold wrapped treasure – the remarkable power of choice.
Many people have allowed themselves to be sucked into these types of scams. We believe what we want to believe and our beliefs are based on our life’s experiences. Beliefs aren’t real until we make them real for us.
Our opinions eventually become our beliefs. This matters, because our beliefs shape our whole life. If we never give a second thought to where our opinions come from, we’re missing out on a way to reach our goals.
It’s amazing how much advice is out there. Even when you don’t ask for it.
Going through a life changing experience can bring us closer, but inflicting others with our perspective on that experience can drive us further apart. Or at the very least, drive our friends around the bend.
So here are my tips on how to give advice, and how to stop giving advice. Please.
Facts vs. Opinions. I was recently on a Zoom call with a group of friends and I found myself enthusiastically participating in a heated discussion of politics that had its share of both.
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One of my favourite quotes reminds me that “if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.” It is time for me to heed that lesson and expand my own horizons by exploring new, diverse and exciting methods of reaching out to all of you and, hopefully, many others.
We don’t give up on our dreams, hopes, goals and aspirations because we’re tired, or because it’s hard, because it’s taking too long, or because it hurts. No! We give up on our dreams, hopes goals and aspirations because we simply don’t want them badly enough, strongly enough or desperate enough.
In more than 25 years of working with hundreds of coaching clients, I have heard every imaginable reason for not doing the things they have acknowledged will lead them to achieving their goals and have committed to do. Countless clients have told me they will do “whatever it takes” to reach their goals only to hear them, several days or weeks later, explain why they didn’t or couldn’t.